7 Ways to Handle Narcissists In The Work Place
Have you ever worked with a narcissist? Chances are, you have. These individuals can be exhausting, difficult, and detrimental to both your well-being and career growth.
Narcissists crave attention, undermine colleagues, and manipulate others for personal gain. Even a single narcissist in the workplace can create a toxic environment, leading to resentment—especially if they hold a position of influence.
So, what can you do?
While avoiding them completely may not be possible, understanding how to navigate their behaviour can make all the difference. Let’s explore how to identify a narcissist and the best ways to handle them.
Identifying a Narcissist
- Lack of empathy and emotional intelligence
- The constant need for applause and validation
- Habitual lying to get ahead
- Shifting blame onto others to protect themselves
- Publicly putting others down
- Jealousy-driven refusal to acknowledge your achievements
- Taking credit for your work
- Interrupting or disregarding your input in conversations
- Exploiting your weaknesses for their gain
Who Can Be a Narcissist?
A narcissist can be anyone—your coworker, your boss, or even someone who initially seems friendly but later reveals manipulative tendencies. Recognising their behaviour early is key to managing interactions effectively.
1. Keep Your Distance
Maintaining distance from a narcissist isn’t always easy, especially if they sit nearby or happen to be your boss. However, creating a professional boundary is crucial. Avoid engaging in their gossip, steer clear of their drama, and remain composed. Be firm yet polite, particularly if they try to push extra workload onto you. While this may not always be a foolproof strategy, it can buy you time to consider other resolutions or even a job change if necessary.
2. Stay in Control of Your Emotions
Narcissists thrive on provoking emotional reactions. Their behaviour can be infuriating, but reacting impulsively can play into their hands. Losing control may make you an easy target, allowing them to manipulate the situation in their favour. Keeping your composure ensures you retain the upper hand, making it less likely that they’ll continue their attempts to intimidate you.
3. Know Your Rights – Read the HR Rulebook
If a narcissist is causing workplace toxicity, familiarize yourself with company policies on harassment and toxic behaviour. Seek guidance from HR or a trusted leader, and don’t be afraid to document and report inappropriate conduct. Even if the narcissist is in a leadership position, they are still accountable to company policies and will likely avoid scrutiny if they know they are being watched.
4. Accept That They Won’t Change
Trying to change a narcissist is futile. Their behaviour is deeply ingrained, and expecting them to develop empathy or self-awareness overnight is unrealistic. Instead of hoping for transformation, focus on how to manage your interactions with them. When they behave appropriately, respond in kind—but when they cross the line, be prepared to defend yourself professionally.
5. Keep a Record of Everything
Keeping a paper trail can be invaluable, especially if a narcissist’s behaviour escalates. Save emails, messages, and any documentation that highlights their manipulation or mistreatment. Take notes on unfair treatment, gaslighting, or workplace sabotage. If you ever need to escalate the issue to HR or a superior, having concrete evidence will strengthen your case.
6. Seek Support from Others
You don’t have to face a narcissist alone. Reach out to trusted colleagues, mentors, or HR professionals who may have experience dealing with the individual in question. Seeking support not only provides emotional relief but can also lead to useful insights or collective action against problematic behaviour.
7. Prioritise Yourself
Narcissists prioritize themselves above all else, so you should do the same—without compromising your integrity. Focus on building relationships with positive colleagues, developing new skills, and advancing your career. By keeping your eyes on your success, you reduce the impact a narcissist can have on your professional experience.
Final Thoughts
Dealing with narcissists in the workplace is challenging, but these seven strategies can help you maintain control, protect your mental well-being, and continue thriving in your career. Stay professional, set boundaries, and keep your focus on what truly matters—your growth and success.
Have you ever had to deal with a narcissistic coworker or boss? Share your experiences in the comments below!